Seeing Life With a Black Eye

Seeing Life With a Black Eye

I'll put it out there right off the bat. I'm a black man and an Obama admirer. I thought he spoke to and represented what America might be. That she might acknowledge the existence of differences in race, gender, social status, and still work together for the greater good of the country. Though I'm not an American, that is the America I would love to see. I am therefore disappointed that every time I turn on the television, I have to endure the same clips I have now seen or heard a thousand times and watch supposed pundits keep resuscitating the story of his connection to Reverend Wright. Bill Clinton might have been right afterall. The start of Obama's campaign was akin to a fairy-tale. He was darling of the media, no salacious stories about him, and no mud on him - until now. The same media has skewered the man and held him to the fire of his former pastor's rhetoric until he turned black.

He did not choose to be black any more than Paris Hilton chose to be white. You might say he is a victim of circumstance. Hold on... think about it. Could you say Paris Hilton is a victim of circumstance? Why not? The truth is, when you are born, you have no say over the circumstances in which you find yourself but you can be involved in determining your path thereafter. Depending on what they are up against, it may be easier for some than for others. Race is one of those things that can be a major challenge especially if you are reminded of it directly or indirectly. The Senator did not want to run as a black candidate but he has been forced to address issues less as an American than as a black man.

Many who are now grilling Obama, do not know what it means to be who he is. Those who say he is where he is because of who he is do not know what it means to be who he is. Indulge me while I try to present this understanding from a common (black) man's point of view. It means attending a summer camp as a 10-year old in Leeds, England and having to sit at a table or on a bus seat by yourself because you are from the "Dark Continent" while the other kids chatter away and ignore you. Only a black man knows what it means to walk down a busy (safe) street in downtown Fort Worth and see a woman immediately clutch her purse tightly against her bosom while looking at him in fear and suspicion. I know what it means to be out shopping in Oranienburg, Germany and hear yourself called what I later learned was "nigger swine" and be grabbed by three decent-looking men and slammed against a store window. In 2000, I traveled to Paraguay with two white colleagues on a mission project. At Asuncion airport, they were processed in minutes. When my turn came, I was yanked out of line and my documents taken away, I presume, for more intense scrutiny. For about an hour I endured the quizzical stares of other fliers. No, blackness is no fairy-tale existence. Neither is it a privileged position. And you are reminded of it regardless of where you are across the globe.

Here's another thought. Sometimes, all it takes is a single negative remark to scar a child for life especially if it comes from an authority figure. Now think about forcibly taking a people from their homeland, stripping them of their names, families, traditions and social structure and subjugating them for 400 years. Why is it easier to ascribe the actions of a serial rapist and killer as due to childhood abuse than to understand when a man gives vent to the frustrations of decades of inequality? Why should the latter be such fodder for prime-time television for days on end? Hear me again, I do not excuse what Reverend Wright said neither do I hold those views, but I understand where he's coming from. It can be exasperating to fight for social change and it comes grudgingly at a glacial pace. And sometimes it is hard to ascribe blame for the hold-up. Trying to change a single human is complex enough let alone an entire society.

This I believe. When a man gives vent to frustration, it does not necessarily reflect his philosophy of life. No one honestly desiring to live a healthy social, mental, and physical life would want to wallow in the bitterness of past and continuing injustices. At the same time, just like a volcano erupts to release heat and pressure that has built up over the years, a person may vent in order to maintain his sanity otherwise he would go postal. Would that we all try to understood that. I have sometimes come home after what I thought was an incident where I was profiled and complained about it to my wife or in bitter prayer to God - not because he made me black, but because my blackness is a label by which I am expected to live. When it's over, I still attend church, which is mostly Caucasians as are our close family friends. I do not chose friends or associates based on color, gender, or whatever other criterion. If I encounter and individual and we hit it off - great!

I must confess I have been guilty of profiling people myself. Case in point: My friend and I were traveling to Kenya a couple of years ago. We boarded the flight at Phoenix airport and found our seats. Shortly, a young Caucasian woman in her early twenties came and sat next to me. I said to my friend in Kiswahili "Watch this lady ask for a change of seats because she'll not want to sit next to two black guys." When I turned to face her, she flashed me a smile and said pleasantly, "Hi." That's all it took to erase my presuppositions and we talked like old friends all the way to Minneapolis. I learned an important lesson. Life can be lived in brilliant color, but we chose to live it in black and white.